Two Mini Reviews: Uncharted 3 and Battlefield 3

Holy hell we have a lot on our plate this November. Sometimes we just can't keep up with it all. Luckily, we have a backup plan for when such an event occurs. It's called "half-assing". It's when we write a smaller, more compact review for a game that probably deserves a full-length one. I've delayed these long enough to let's get to gettin'

BATTLEFIELD 3

I used to be addicted to the older Battlefield games. When 1942 came out I spent unknown hours missing people with a sniper rifle. A couple of expansions later Battlefield 2 came out and my computer couldn't play it very well. It told me I needed better everything almost, and better internet too (I lived in the middle of nowhere at the time). So I said, "Okay..." And then I paused for a moment.

I was done with upgrading my system. Most of my games were on consoles anyway so I decided to leave PC gaming behind. And for a long time, it really didn't bother me. Well, with all the hype surrounding Battlefield 3, and with its existence on consoles, I decided to pick it up for the 360. Goddamn, was that ever a mistake. When it asked me to download the graphics all I could do was scoff. "This fucker is on two discs and you can't include the graphics?" I had enough room, and and an Elite model so I could actually do it, unlike those poor saps with a Slim, and it's a decent time. And, of course, I'm referring to the mutiplayer. The campaign is a practice in absolute boredom and frustration. You die almost instantly and your "allies" will straight up push you out of cover. I hated it. But, as I said, the mutliplayer was fun.            

Except for this fucking flashlight. It's so bad they're going to patch it.

 Not long after this purchase, a friend came over and told me my laptop would absolutely play Battlefield on the highest settings. So I took a chance and picked up a copy. I couldn't get enough. It was better-looking, there was teamwork, and, most importantly, there were 64 player games. It was beautifully controlled chaos and, until Skyrim came out, it was all I wanted to do. In fact, it solidified my decision to not buy Modern Warfare 3.  The experience was much deeper, and the upgrades felt a lot more important. Unlike picking one class and sticking with it, I needed to practice with everything, because different situations called for different responses. It was the experience I had been waiting for for some time.

Just don't fly this if you don't know how, dammit!

As I said before, though, the campaign is boring. I got excited when they gave me a jet, and then I realized that I would be sitting in the back merely shooting at people. Then we turned our sights to forces on the ground and I couldn't even shoot at them. I was just telling other planes where to bomb. I almost fell asleep. Sure, there are impressive set pieces, but all you do is watch them. If you absolutely need a single-player campaign, look elsewhere.

Way more boring than it might seem

UNCHARTED 3

I was a little worried about this one. After Uncharted 2, I was incredibly concerned about Naughty Dog's ability to top it. And that's not a slight against Naughty Dog either. It's just that Uncharted 2 was so action packed, so well-paced, so full of character development, and just so... perfect, that I didn't know how it could be topped. And, as it turns out, I had every right to think about it. Uncharted 3 is, in some ways, a step down from 2.

Don't get me wrong. Uncharted 3 is still amazing. The action is still there. The sense of adventure and discovery is still in tact. It just doesn't have the same impact.

It is pretty, though.

 The issue lies with several problems. For one, it never matches the same level of excitement as Uncharted 2. True, there are a couple of great moments, but I wasn't constantly on edge like I was in 2. In 2, I felt like anything could happen at any time. I was regularly taken by surprise. This wasn't completely absent in 3,  but I was easily able to suspect what would happen next. Yes, the plane chapter is breathtaking. I won't deny that. But that moment has been advertised regularly for a while. I've known about it for months and it's the most exciting moment of the game. I'm serious. I never felt like that scene was topped. Yes, the game had other great moments, but I never held my breath more than when I was slowly making my way back into the cargo hold, or what happens after.

Seriously. How could you top this?

I won't lie and say the game isn't cinematic. In true Uncharted form, it absolutely is. But nowadays I feel like I'm playing along with a script. No matter how well I do, I'll still fall into this trap, or I'll still get hit by this car.  This isn't necessarily a terrible thing. It's a very well written script. I just can't shake the feeling that I'm being dragged down a specific path, which I am. Even in a vast desert environment, I'm encouraged to go a set way.

Then there's how much damage the enemies take. One of the biggest problems with Uncharted 1 was how much damage the mercs you were fighting would soak up. A straight shot to the head was never guaranteed  to drop anyone. This was fixed in 2, but it seems to be back. No, it's not as bad, but it's still ridiculous. When I shoot someone in the head, they should die. Especially when I nail a sniper that has the ability to kill me in one hit. It's just not fair. Sure, a shotgun blast to the face will end most enemies, but getting that close is often dangerous. I'm not complaining that the game is too hard, I'm complaining about it being unfair. When I'm surrounded by several men with rocket launches, snipers, and assault rifles I want my shots to count.

"Don't worry, fellas'! He's only got a gun!"

 Another issue is the hand-to-hand combat. Seeing it done in 2009 was something special. It was fluid and impressive. However, fresh off of Arkham City it looks rather sloppy. I've seen way worse, but a bit of the magic seems gone. The Animation seems more broken up and the moves get really repetitive. I know Nathan isn't Batman, but I expected improvement. I didn't really see much.

I know I'm probably sounding a bit harsh. I just expected more. Don't get me wrong. The game is absolutely worth playing. The script is still amazing, the characters are still well-developed, and the history they delve into concerning Nathan and Sully's past is fantastic. I thoroughly enjoyed it. It just wasn't everything I wanted.

But like I said, it's fucking pretty

 That's all I have to say about that. Stay tuned for reviews of Rayman Origins and Saint's Row the Third! *Spoiler* They're fantastic.