Duke Nukem Forever Release Date Announced. Space/Time Remains Intact

Everyone said it was vaporware. All hope had been lost. Duke Nukem became the internet's biggest joke as we all laughed to keep from crying over the loss of guns such as the ripper. The developers went under as gameplay videos leaked out showing us what we were truly losing. Then Gearbox picked it up and said it would see the light of day. Only a few were quick to renounce their doubt, however, as we still, after 12 years of waiting, were without a release date. Well, now everyone can officially don their fancy eating bibs and eat their own words, which I guess involves writing your own quote on a piece of paper and choking it down. Duke Nukem Forever's release date has been announced, and it's May 3rd. Along with this comes a new, actually really awesome, trailer. Watch now!


NSFW. Oh, did I mention that a bit late?

Welp, let's all fess up. We're excited. Now all we have to do is sit back and wait for the announcement that Osama has been caught, North Korea has disarmed, and Iran is having a regime change. Also, everyone gets a unicorn. Always bet on the duke!