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Friday, December 31, 2010

Johnny Fanboy's Game of the Year.

Introduction from the Outlaw:
Hello everyone. We just hired a new writer who wishes to be known as Johnny Fanboy. We haven't set up his account just yet, so he will be sending all his work to me. He wants to make damn sure you all know he wrote this and not me even though I posted it, because in his words I am "a faggy fagnub who faggingly gave a fag score to Halo: Reach because it wasn't fagging high enough... because [I] am a fag." So without further adieu, Johnny Fanboy.

GAME OF THE YEAR: HALO REACH

HALOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Hey fags and faggettes, this is Johnny Fanboy telling you what the real game of the year is: Halo Reach. You can ignore the rest of the "guys'" posts because they are all wrong. They are total nerds and I sleep with their moms huhuhuhuh! Sure, that Morgan dude gave it runner up but that's not good enough! NOT FOR THE BEST GAME THAT HAS EVER EXISTED! And Stephen giving Reach a 10 for multiplayer; I don't care if that's the highest score... IT DESERVES HIGHER! I mean c'mon, the campaign is PERFECT! The multiplayer is BEYOND PERFECT! Don't believe me? I'll play you on xbox live and totally kick you're ass. Then I'll go to your house and kick your ass. Hahahahah. Stupid nerds. How much do you benchpress? I can lift more. Fags.

RUNNER UP: HALO REACH

I'M BETTER THAN ALL THESE GUYS! WHICH MEANS I'M BETTER THAN YOU!

Who cares about other games when there's Halo, brah! That's all I fucking need! Just play it and you would understand. Oh wait... if you only have a PS3 or a Wii you can't... HA! Get a real console fags. Then I can kick your ass while I drink a bruskie. HALO! Seriously, I wish I could give this award to Halo 1, 2, 3, or all of them, but Chris says I can't because they didn't come out this year. Fag.

BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENT: EVERYTHING THAT'S NOT HALO REACH

THIS IS WHAT I'LL DO TO YOU FAGS!

Seriously, all those other games suck. Why would you even play them when there's Halo. Man, none of those come even close. Red Dead Retarded would be sooo much better if it had space marines. And Master Chief could totally kick Shepard's ass. Then he'd meet that Bayonetta chick and make her his bitch. JUST LIKE I'LL MAKE YOU ALL MY BITCH IN HALO! Don't believe me? Play me. My Gamertag is AwesomeWeedSmokerWhosBetterThanYou69. Lol. I put the number 69 in there because it's totally funny. Also, I totally smoke weed and am better than you. I'm just kidding. That's not my gamertag. Like I'd ever want to play with you fags. And fuck off. Kick your ass later!

Ending message from the Outlaw:
Well everyone... Johnny Fanboy... yay...

The Outlaw's Game of the Year!

Well everyone, it's New Year's Eve which means it's time for me to look back on 2010's gaming catalog and choose my game of the year, my runner-up, and my biggest disappointment. It also means that I have to take time out from getting hammered to write this. So let's get on with it!

GAME OF THE YEAR: MASS EFFECT 2


If this blog existed back when Mass Effect 2 came out, Stephen and I probably would have killed each other fighting over who got to review it. The thing is Mass Effect 2 was brilliant for a billion different reasons. For one, it took a really good game and improved everything about it. The shooting was better, the graphics were better, the dialogue was better, and we got to delve deeper into a bunch of characters we had already started to love. Beyond that, getting to upload your old profile from ME1 was amazing. Seeing all my old decisions effect the sequel made the universe feel all the more real and it gave you the impression that your decisions really did have long-lasting consequences. I even welcomed the large amount of new characters with open arms (seeing the point of view of a Geth, who is actually 1,000 geth is awesome).

Sure, some people hated mining. I honestly didn't care because I felt it was relaxing and anything was better than the Mako. Also, we no longer had cluttered menus to deal with. All of this came together to make a universe I think I might love more than Star Wars (and that's saying a lot). You can bet that Mass Effect 3 will probably take my GotY again when it comes out.

RUNNER UP: RED DEAD REDEMPTION


As much as I love Mass Effect, this decision was super difficult to make. As you can probably tell from my online handle, I am a huge fan of the Old West. For years I had been waiting for a game that I felt captured the feel of the time period. We had Red Dead Revolver, which was good but much too campy to be the game I was looking for.
Then there was Gun, which I loved but it didn't have the level of polish it needed. Then Rockstar worked with a clean slate (remember that Red Dead Revolver was originally being made by Capcom) and holy shit did they hit the ball out of the park.

First of all, the game looks even better than GTAIV. Seriously, go look at how everyone in GTA looks like their faces are covered in vaseline and how they are animated when not in a cutscene. Compare that to how much more real everyone in Red Dead looks and animates. Back? See, I told you so. On top of that, the world is incredibly gorgeous. I could honestly just ride to the top of a plateau and watch the sunset. There are also a vast number of animals that inhabit the land which you can hunt and skin to make money. I don't know how, but Rockstar manages to make their worlds feel more alive each and every time, and RDR is the apex of that.

But what is a landscape without characters? Well let me tell you, RDR has plenty of great ones. Not only does everyone in the cast have their own desires, motives, and personalities, but they are all memorable. Everyone is so well written and acted that I could probably recite the entire cast off the top of my head. Add to that great shooting and riding mechanics and you have a near perfect game.

Normally that would be enough to seal the deal, but the game goes even farther with one of the best stories I've seen in a long time. I won't spoil anything, but I rarely get as attached to game characters as I did to Marston. Seeing the game's events culminate into the ending is one of the best gaming experiences I've ever had. Also, if you haven't read my article about riding into Mexico while the original song "Far Away" plays do so. It might be the greatest gaming moment of the year.

BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENT: METROID: OTHER M



I wrote a review for this back when it came out and my opinion still stands. It was in no way my least favorite game of the year, just the most disappointing , hence the category. The thing is, I am a huge Nintendo fanboy and I just expected more. There were just too many problems. While I liked the map layout and the powerups, the controls just weren't good enough. First of all, using a D-pad to move around in a 3D area just isn't precise enough. Oh, and have I mentioned how much I hated standing still to fire missiles? Cause I do. However, that wasn't my biggest problem.

My strongest complaint is the story and I direct most of the blame at Team Ninja. I expected them to turn Nintendo's classic heroin into an even bigger bad-ass, but, in a brilliant stroke of sexism, they turned her into an order-taking submissive who wouldn't do anything unless Adam told her she could. Not only was this insulting to the character, but it made the story look stupid as Samus would stand and watch someone in peril until Adam okay-ed the use of a new weapon. Combine that with a story arch about an under-cover assassin that never gets resolved or mentioned again and you can consider the ball officially dropped. Now that Retro Studios has finished the amazing Donkey Kong Country Returns, hopefully they'll be given back the reigns to the Metroid franchise.

Game of the Year from The Good Doctor

Well, 2010 is finally over. And personally I’m glad. My 21st birthday is ten days from now, more video games will be coming out soon, and most importantly, the first decade of the 21st century is over. Now people finally have no excuse to refer to the date as “two thousand-whatever.” It’s “twenty-eleven” now.

OH WAIT NOT VIDYA GAMES.

Anyway, this all in all was a pretty good year for gamers. We had games like Halo: Reach, Epic Mickey, Donkey Kong Returns, Sonic 4, and others. Like any year, there are some that don’t measure up though, but here, for me, at least, are the two games most deserving of the title “Game of the Year.”

Game of the Year:

Red Dead Redemption

This one was a bit of a shoe-in for me, as I, unbeknownst to many, am a huge fan of westerns. I loved Red Dead Revolver, this game’s vastly different predecessor, for all its ridiculous campy glory. Exploding Pig-Men, Circus-Midget-Banditos, and invisible bear men and all. When I heard there was to be a more serious toned sequel, I was overjoyed.

What I really enjoyed most about this game was that serious tone that Rockstar approached it with. Rockstar’s previous endeavors were all good, campy, over the top fun, but with Grand Theft Auto 4, they suddenly stopped having ridiculous excuse plots, and their humor became much more savagely directed at the flaws in our modern society. I bring this up because Red Dead Redemption does much of the same thing. Many people have in their minds, a sort of idea of “The Grand Old West,” where cowboys rode wild, and life was all about freedom. In reality, the very existence of the frontier western culture was being fought against tooth and nail by the powers of “advancement” from the very moment. The true old west as we know it only really existed roughly between the years of 1875-1895. Red Dead Redemption takes place in the year 1911, which most people don’t even think of as being part of the “Old West” era, and it’s this very discrepancy that the game bases itself around. The idea that the age of the frontiersman was dead. Also prominent is the idea of how, at the same time, the lack of civilization that allowed the lawlessness of the West to flourish was not to be idealized, but showed just how awful life could get for people. However, in spite of all this somberness, the game still manages to have Rockstar’s signature sense of humor, and there is a colorful assortment of characters to help John Marston in his journey, and the game certainly does manage to be a lot of fun. John Marston himself is a great character, who, I absolutely cannot stress enough, has the patience of a saint. He has to deal with thieving snake oil salesmen, lazy drunken assholes, idiotic lawmen, all while trying to track down a man who he has to chase practically across 4 states.

As far as the gameplay itself goes, the controls are very well done, utilizing a similar targeting system than that of GTAIV, but with a few tweaks so that the game isn’t doing all of your aiming for you, which I quite liked. The only issue I had with the controls was that I thought the weapon selection wheel was a bit awkward to use in combat.


Runner Up:

Bayonetta

I love hack ‘n slash games. It’s a damn shame to me that there aren’t more good ones out there. You’ve pretty much got the Devil May Cry series, the God of War series, and then an assortment of games that are essentially just palette swaps of them. These games, such as Dante’s Inferno, or Darksiders, are by no means bad, but they’re just sort of playing “follow the leader,” and it was getting kind of annoying looking for a new hack ‘n slash game that was its own.

Enter Bayonetta.

Bayonetta is made by the same creative team that made the Devil May Cry franchise, and has been called a sort of spiritual successor to them by many. While this is not entirely inaccurate, it would be better to call it what I see it as: a deliberate, completely over the top parody of ridiculous action games like the Devil May Cry or God of War series. Now, this parody is by no means mean spirited, as if to say “here’s what you’re doing wrong.” It felt more like the creators simply said, “hey you know how we had ridiculous, physically impossible moves in Devil May Cry? Yeah, those were cool. Ridiculous, but cool. Well, let’s take those same kind of moves, and make them even more ridiculous and impossible. Bayonetta is so over the top, that anyone I’ve known who started a new save file on it would begin the opening action scene saying something to the effect of “HOLY SHIT I DON’T KNOW WHAT’S GOING ON BUT IT’S FUCKING AWESOME!”

The moves, cutscenes, bosses, and pretty much everything about the game is every crazy action game stereotype turned way way up. “So action game heroes always use two guns? FUCK THAT SHE’S USING FOUR. WITH TWO ON HER FEET. I DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW THAT WORKS BUT I DON’T CARE.”

“So action games have recently been using brutal looking finishing moves? WELL SHIT SON WE’RE GONNA MAKE HER USE EROTIC TORTURE INSTRUMENTS ON THEM. SLAP AN ANGEL IN THE ASS AND CALL ME ‘DARLING,’ MOTHERFUCKER!”

The characters are also ridiculous as well, from porn star/librarian/witch Bayonetta, her beleaguered Joe-Pesci like driver, to Ronin, the game’s answer to Mr. T, Mike Tyson, and Miceal Clarke Duncan (that big ass black guy from The Green Mile).

Also present in the game are about a million different shout outs and references to other games, from Bayonetta using Dante from Devil May Cry’s guns, to collecting what are called “halos” but in reality are the rings from Sonic games. There’s literally more here than I could list, and I haven’t even finished the game yet.

My one complaint about the game though, is that it’s very hard. Not so hard that I have trouble beating the levels, but hard enough that I can’t play through them with the grace and style that a character as kick ass as Bayonetta deserves. When you die, or get a low ranking on a mission, you feel bad because you’re saying to yourself “dammit, Bayonetta would do better than that. Not this sloppy-ass shit.” And any game that pushes you to perform with that in mind is alright in my book.

Alright, so those are my two favorite games of 2010. But unfortunately, not all the games out this year were great. And so, my award for biggest disappointment goes to:

Biggest Disappointment:

Silent Hill: Shattered Memories

Let me start off with a bit of a disclaimer. This game originally came out in December of 2009, on the Wii. However, in late January of 2010, Konami released a port for the PS2, which, if you’re going to play this game at all, I would recommend playing it on the PS2, not the Wii. The controls for the Wii version are kind of awful.

Alright now with that aside, allow me to give a bit of backround on this game. It was originally billed as a remake of the first Silent Hill game, to which many rejoiced. It was then announced that it was not going to feature any combat whatsoever, which was actually greeted with more enthusiasm than you would think. Many realized that the best aspects of the Silent Hill series came not from fighting the monsters, but by being freaked out by the atmospheric environments.

Then the bad news started coming. It was said that rather than a straight up remake of the first game, it was to be a “reimagining” of the first game. This got quite a few groans, as that’s essentially what the Silent Hill movie was, and while not terrible, most agreed the movie would have been better if it had stuck to its roots more.

But, being the Silent Hill fanatic that I am, I decided to give this game a try when I found out it was available for the PS2. And much like the movie, there is nothing patently awful about this game, but overall, it just fails to scare like the previous games did, the levels have nowhere near the amount of horrific atmosphere they had in previous games, and the system implemented to avoid enemy encounters was just rather boring.

The story itself, which is usually what the chief focus of a Silent Hill game is anyway, again, while not being terrible, wasn’t overly well done, and while the twist at the end was rather well done, it was nothing that hasn’t been done before in the Sixth Sense or Fight Club. The setting itself didn’t really gel well with other Silent Hill games as well, where the town had genuine elements of the supernatural, whereas in this game, it’s much more cerebral, and, to my tastes, not in a terribly interesting way.

What makes it be on this list though, is not it being a truly bad game, per say, but rather, the feeling I get by looking at it and saying, in the words of John Whittier, “Of all the sad words of tongue and pen, the saddest are these: It might have been” This might have been a great way for the Silent Hill series to break away from its terrible camera system, and the clunky combat, but in the process, it seems to have broken away from what made the franchise great in the first place.

Game of the Year from The Elitist!

What? 2011? Riiight.. okay "sure" it is! *laughter*
Happy New Year lovely people, from your friend The Elitist!
Here is the deal, in the following letters that fill this page, you will read words, made up of said letters,  that create these categories, announces their topic, and will describe how such decisions were reached. The word will create Game of the Year, Runner up (because picking one game is too damn hard), and the biggest disappointment, from 2010!
So without further adieu, I bring you the Game of the Year article from yours truly, The Elitist!


Game of the Year: Mass Effect 2

Note: A few spoilers from ME 1 ahead. I try to be careful with ME2 but come on... go play it. 


So, this is a challenge for me, because I could talk about this game all day, and I'm going to try to not just gush over how much I love it (too much). So let us see. Why is Mass Effect 2 so awesome? I suppose a good place to start is at the center, with Commander Shepard. He is such a badass. Disagree? Well you are wrong, and I will explain to you why I am unquestionably wrong with no bias what so ever. He destroyed hundreds of Geth with only the help of his crew, who he gathered through his charisma. He destroyed a Reaper, a thinking machine as big as a space frigate. Yea he killed it. He killed Harbinger, the hive-mind of the Collectors (of whom he killed hundreds). Before that, he himself was killed by the very same Collectors and, quoting the game, all it did was piss him off. He is a man (or a woman..?) definitively being the smoothest talker out there, and being the center of desire for all the babes (studs?). He's the epitome of Hero and is cooler than that action hero you like.
Obama Shepard will fight. For Change.
(Also, he can be President Barak Obama. [This is supposed to be funny, okay internet?]) Although Shepard would be nothing without his crew. Who are the next jewel in the crown of this game. They are perfect characters. Whether you hate the character or love him/her you cannot deny the fact that they have a set, solid, and substantial personality. Each and every person in the game feels like someone you could meet. They are unique have quirks talents, likes and dislikes. The members of Shepard's crew all have personalities that are built and displayed in such a flawless fluidity as the relationship between Shepard and the character grows, the player gets a very real feeling of friendship, hate, or even love, from the members aboard the Normandy. That's not so say that this happens only on the Normandy. Every single person the Commander encounters is different. They are solid, real characters and they make the game feel so much more personal, and much more enjoyable. Finally, taking the broadest step we can, the game is all tied with a bow of the perfect setting. The universe in which Mass Effect takes place is so expansive. I don't mean the physical universe, but the atmosphere, the setting. The rules, the ideas, and characteristics of the world in which Shepard live. BioWare has created an enormous expansive canvas, on which only a portion has been painted. There is so much potential in the Mass Effect world, that I will not only be surprised to see the franchise end with ME3, I would also be deeply disappointed in the failed grab at the raw potential.



Game of the Year Runner-Up: StarCraft II

This was literally one of the hardest choices for the blog I have ever had to make. StarCraft 1 was the first video game I really got into, thanks to my father who was a huge RTS fan (Command and Conquer being his personal favorite). So I literally grew up playing StarCraft. I had been waiting for SCII for years. A majority of my life. It's release was what I had been wanting for a long time... a long time. The game was everything I wanted it be. Updated campaign modes, newer objective with game mechanics not seen in an RTS ever before. A story line that left you wanting more, anticipating the next installment, and most importantly; A near perfect multi-player. That is where the excitement is for me. Head to head with another human.
Protoss: "I think we are in trouble, sir."
Testing out strategy, trickery and skill with our race. Utilizing your units to their full potential to out maneuver your opponent. Controlling the map, or simply wiping them out early. Coming back from a major defeat to win.These are the reason I love this game so much. I have never ever had a game give me an adrenaline burst, but during the heat of an epic offensive, or during crucial scouting runs, or harassment campaigns, I get so into the game, it's almost like tunnel vision. I absolutely love every minute of it. So, why runner-up? Well, I realize while this game was my perfection, it does not meet the quality of ME2. It's close. Damn close. In some ways in reserves GotY over ME2, but I could not find enough wrong with either game to make a clear decision. So, my decision is based on core game creation quality. In which, the lack of repetitive styles of play give ME2 a slight boost, due to a quirk in how RTS' are played, to no real fault of their own. It's just the way it is. I must defer to the detail involved in ME, that is lacking to a small degree in SC.

Disappointment of the Year: Metroid: Other M

I am made sad just thinking about it. I was so very excited for this game. I have played (maybe not beaten) every Metroid game made. I love the franchise, it is a classic that will live in my heart with alien/pirate busting joy (Samus would someday be my wife, were she real). I wanted this game, so badly, to be excellent. It let me down, left me in the restaurant alone. Team Ninja... you stood me up. 

Now that I have made a humorous introduction, the game is not bad. The Ninja Gaiden style suites Samus quite well and added some new charm to the combat typical of a Metroid game, while still holding the side scrolling fascination. The first problem in game play come in when you start having to utilize the rockets. Uggghhhhhhhhh. For some reason, game designers for the Wii have this weird supernatural urge to utilize the Wii's ridiculous motion control nonsense and ruin an otherwise perfect control scheme. Shoot rockets.. you have to aim at the screen, and it moves into first person mode. This would be fine, except you can't freaking move.
Oh hai! Go ahead, I'll wait!
So if you ever want (need) to shoot rockets, you better hope that big mean boss who wants to rend you in half and eat your insides will sit patiently and wait for you the launch a volley of missiles at him. I bet you can guess how often that happens.  They try once again to use this aiming balderdash by creating moments in the game that require you to search for something. You scan it, and are allowed to move on. Stupid stupid stupid. Often you have literally NO EFFING IDEA what you are looking for, and end up just looking online because you think "This is absolutely ridiculous." Finally, the character development, story line, and voice acting are mediocre at best. I, from the beginning, supported Samus' voice actor giving her the benefit of the doubt, and creating theories as to why she sounded so uninterested in some of her narrations. As it turns out, she just is not very animated as a voice actor. Samus' character was shallow, her relationships with the other characters were superficial and without much substance, save for some flashbacks and past happening. It all seemed a little slapped together, lacking the care needed to create a truly alluring story. A decent game otherwise. Bastard hard at times, and like I mentioned above, barely skin deep. Worth a rent, but certainly a disappointing game. Although... Team ninja did do one thing right. (spoilers in that link, by the way) 

Game of the Year from ManusDei!

The Good, The Better, and The Unfortunate. 

Welcome to ManusDei's Game of the Year article. First of all, I would like to wish everyone a safe New Years and a fantastic 2011. Also, I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday, whatever it may have been. What follows is my personal snapshot of this year in gaming. But enough with pleasantries. You do not read our articles to find warm and cozy wishes or to feel better about yourself. No. You read them because you want to know our honest, somewhat broken, and always entertaining views of what is going on in the gaming world. If you do not fall into that category, pretend that you do. Then it will still be right. Thanks & Gig'em.

The Good (Runner Up to Game of the Year): Halo Reach

To be brutally honest, I'm a huge fan of Halo Reach. It is a near-perfect blend of the Halo and Call of Duty games. When I was playing the beta, I knew this was one game I would have to own. And thus I found myself at my first midnight release (all you intense gamers are probably crying because I have only been to one, and all you casual gamers are crying because I went to any at all....). Mind you, I am a very biased player of most games these days. I prefer online modes where you are pitted against other real-life players instead of trudging through campaign content (I'm probably signing my death warrant). I cannot tell you the last campaign I played for more than a few levels and maybe even completed. Unless you count *spoiler alert* WoW *end spoiler alert*. But back to the task at hand. Essentially what I'm saying is, all I have played is multiplayer matchmaking. But do not be fooled by my lack of breadth into the many wonders of Halo Reach. I have been told many first-hand accounts of the excellence and badassery that is the campaign, firefight, and co-op modes. And, dare I say, those accounts may have factored into my decision. But I believe the real pride and joy of Bungie's release is matchmaking.

I have played various matchmaking game types from previous Halo games, and my favorites still stand in Reach: Team Slayer, Team Swat, Arena Doubles (once Team Doubles), and Rumble Pit. Of these, my favorite depends on the day and how I am playing. Doubles tends to be my favorite, because even if my teammate sucks I can usually worry about the other team on my own. Slayer... depends on the rest of my team (teehee, Team Slayer relies on team, teehee). Suppressing fire, holding power weapons, lots of stuff you just cannot do on your own, no matter how hard you try. Swat is a very volatile game type. You can get 30 kills in one game, go plus 25 K/D, and then get DOMINATED in your next game. With headshots being a one hit kill, internet connectivity plays a bit of a role. But it really just depends on who is feeling it in that game. And finally we have Rumble Pit. The real way to get better at all Halo games. Some of you are probably whining about kill-stealing and always getting shot from everywhere. But guess what? That's how you get better! If you can kill someone one-on-one, have half or no shields, stay alive long enough to see who is shooting at you now, and manage to kill them, you have done something worthwhile. You learn how to survive, when to run, and what battles to fight. Sometimes you will get very frustrated. Deal with it. It happens to all of us. Get better.

So... Lunch later?
Before I go into why Reach did not get my number one spot, I want to talk about a few more features I enjoy about it. One is the new aiming system, which adjusts the size of your reticule based on how often you are firing. If you take a few moments between shots (depending on the gun), you will have an accurate shot. Fire too quickly, and you will find yourself missing what you swear to be headshots. This is a very Call of Duty-esque feature that adds an extra level of skill to the franchise. Timing between shots has become very important. Also, the new grenade mechanics are quite good. Frags are spinning when they are thrown, and bounce much more realistically than in previous games. Except for the odd lack of bounce that occurs depending on where exactly you throw it, but that is only on rare occasions. And stickies. Well. Stickies are God's gift to gaming. Wonderful, those little suckers. The new loadout system is another piece that reminds me of Call of Duty, but adds a whole new level of play to the Halo franchise. Usually, it is excellent, but I do have to say one thing... screw you dude who is using armor lock. I stuck you twice. Curse your children. Another new feature I praise heavily is the responsiveness to player opinion. This comes in two forms: voting for game types and levels, and regular updates based on voting and feedback from players. Bungie adds specific game types if they are chosen enough in the voting rounds, and throws in various other updates as needed. This is a fantastic adjustment to what used to be a more rigid take-what-you-bought system.

But every rose has its thorn(s). The biggest thorn for me is the change in player skill rating. Sure, you can play arena where you get a rating and eventually get placed in a “bracket” to play similar players. After that season is over, you can get rated again. And while this is a good way to overcome the obstacle in Halo 3 of having too much experience and not being able to increase your rating, or having your skill change (for better or worse) but your rating stay the same, I think this takes away from the skill-rated play which I loved about Halo 3. Sure, there was no way I would ever be rated a 50. But seeing someone with that rating always inspired a bit of awe in me. That person (or whoever they bought their account from) put some serious time into that game and was really good. That piece is missing from Reach. You have the experience rankings, game-by-game ratings, season ratings, and online stats. But that awe-inspiring piece that resulted from seeing a 50-rated player just is not there. Other than that, there is little I do not like about Reach. And any problems I do have will probably be ironed out by Bungie as the game evolves.

All-in-all, Halo Reach is one of the best games on the market. With all the new features, and the regular updates from Bungie, what is already a great game will continue to grow. Halo Reach is my runner up.

The Better (Game of the Year): World of Warcraft – Cataclysm

Now I am really asking for it. Wah. He picked an expansion for his game of the year. Wah. He is just a WoW-nerd. Wah. MMO's are not legitimate games. Wah. All I hear is “Wah,” not the stuff in between. So quit wasting your breath. I have been playing World of Warcraft since vanilla (that means I played it before any expansions). I was not a serious player by any stretch of the imagination. Well, at the time anyway. My pride and joy was my level 27 Dwarf paladin, from back in the day when pallies were absolutely ridiculous to play. It was not until the third expansion, Wrath of the Lich King, that I became a bit of a WoW-junkie. Within a few months, I took a squishy level 1 priest to level cap and was living the life of a healer. It helped that I was the luckiest SOB to ever walk the face of Azeroth, because I was consistently rolling the highest rolls for new gear. What I am trying to say is, I was pretty big into WoW pre-Cataclysm. And Cat boasted many changes and updates that intrigued me. Could Blizzard deliver a substantial increase in gameplay? Could they make WoW more casual and more serious? Could Blizzard outdo themselves and remake their franchise?

Absolutely.

When it comes to Cat, I do not even know where to start. And before I say anything more, I want to warn you that I will probably miss a few things. Deal with it. There is too much awesome to put into one article.

The new talent trees are fantastic. I can make a half-decent tree without having to go look online because I actually understand what each talent does. The entire ability system has been redone. There are no longer levels of skills to buy, they just scale with your character level. And new skills are announced to you when you level, as well as being listed in your spellbook. Many class mechanics have been adjusted. I am personally familiar with changes to priests, and it appears we may actually be competitive healers again. Instead of just face-rolling the keyboard, groups must actually decide what enemies to crowd control, who to burn down first, and who to avoid even in basic instances. While some may complain that WoW has become harder, I would challenge them to say that WoW has just become more involved. Know what you are doing, and carry out your role.

It actually is pretty easy being green. When you are a badass
Instancing is not the only way to gear early on. Gaining reputation with the various factions can almost completely gear an entry-level 85. And by completely gear, I mean get you to the item-level requirement for heroic instances. Oh. My. God. Heroics hurt. But I can save that chat for later. Actually... never. You can find that out on your own. Forget what I said before. Heroics are loads of fun! Bring your friends!

The map changes and new leveling zones are well done. The first shock I had was riding the zeppelin from Northrend to Orgrimmar to start leveling from 80 to 85. When I got to Orgrimmar, I did not even know where I was. Having been redesigned for flight, many areas in the old world of Azeroth have changed. It takes a little getting used to. But damn flying there is nice. The new leveling zones are some of the best new features in WoW. All of the zones change based on where you are in the quest lines. And questing in those zones is very streamlined. Quests generally come in groups, and lead you on to new quest locations. Only once or twice in the entire leveling process did I have to wonder where to go to next. The zones themselves are very unique and help leveling seem less ridiculous. But there is only so much you can do to help assuage the experience requirements for higher levels. Blizzard... you devil you. But the process did not feel that bad. Hopefully leveling is relatively pain-free for any other characters I feel like capping...

Well...that kind of sucks.
Having not had the chance to raid any of the new dungeons in Cataclysm, I cannot personally vouch for how good any of the raids may be. However, simply comparing the number of raids should be enough. In their previous expansion, Blizzard released one dungeon at a time: Naxxramas, Vault of Archavon, Ulduar, Trial of the Champion, and Icecrown Citadel. At release, Cataclysm included Blackwing Descent, Bastion of Twilight, Throne of the Four Winds, and Baradin Hold. Baradin Hold is supposed to be similar to the Vault of Archavon, a PvP raid that players can go through when they have control over the surrounding area. But the other three raids are described to be entry-level raids like Naxxramas was in the previous expansion. This could mean that wings may be added to each raid, and those wings will be more difficult but we will not see any more dungeons. Or we may get both new wings and new dungeons. For the time being, there are four raids currently available to players, which is double the number the previous expansion shipped with. Hopefully this is a sign that raid content in Cataclysm will be grand in both depth and breadth.

As I said before, I could not hope to cover everything I would like to in one article about Cataclysm. But let it suffice to say that Blizzard has reforged WoW, making it something that new and old players alike can enjoy. Happy raiding!

The Unfortunate (Gaming Disappointment of the Year): Microsoft Kinect

As a forewarning, I do not own and therefore do not have extensive experience with Kinect. However, gathering information from reviews has proved one thing: Kinect has a lot of room to grow.

I have three potential reasons why Microsoft released Kinect when it did. One – Kinect was actually complete and this was the product they intended to be on shelves. Two – the holiday season was coming up, and Microsoft needed a big, new product to release to compete with Nintendo and Sony. Or three – with the Wii and PS3's technologies evolving beyond the standard controller, Microsoft needed to get something out there to gain a foothold and sate their waiting fans. Of these three reasons, two and three do not require an exemplary product at release. Just a product to release. And that is why Kinect is a disappointment. It has potential, but is far from a complete product.

I like where Microsoft took Kinect. With both voice and movement controls, there is a lot of opportunities for a multitude of new games on the market. But it feels like a partially finished product, rushed to meet a growing demand. I am very excited for software updates and potential hardware upgrades which could easily take Microsoft soaring over its two big competitors. But right now, there is only a mediocre foothold.

Better luck next year.


Happy New Year! BTHO 2011!

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

The Outlaw's Favorite Game Moments: Armed and Dangerous


Please tell me someone else played this hidden gem! Armed a Dangerous came out last generation and it still stands as one of if not the funniest game I've ever played. It was the story of a hero, an old man, a robot, and a Scottish mole man and their quest to overthrow an evil ruler. The journey along the way involved zeppelins, overdoses of medication that led to hallucinations of penguins, a lady in a pond, lepers, etc etc.

However, while I only remember a few jokes and the basics of the plot, there is one thing I'll never forgot. The land shark gun. Yes, you read that right. The game had a land shark gun. It had other ridiculous weapons as well, such as a giant screw-like weapon the hero (Roman I think his name was) would pull out, screw into the ground, and hold on to it as the world turned upside down sending all of the on-screen enemies falling into the sky only to soon fall back to earth from a deadly height. But I digress. This is about land shark gun.

The overall premise is this. Inside the gun are land shark embryos just waiting to be born. The wielder sees enemies and decides it is time to call upon the vicious powers of nature to aid him. He launches the embryo, which in turn burrows into the ground and grows to full maturity in seconds (somehow). It then digs around snatching up enemies
left in right. I'm a little foggy on how many you can launch at a time, but I think it's two. Anyway... OBSERVE!


Sorry about the size. The HTML it gave me looks wonky.

You know what? Instead of parting words, I'll post a video of all the weapons. It's easier.

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

The Elitist's Least Favorite Video Game Moments: Mass Effect 2

No! Wait! It's not what it looks like, I promise!
Seriously though, when I look back and gauge this game (I am also currently replaying it) I constantly tell myself how absolutely perfect this game is. (In my opinion) The universe, the characters, the gameplay (mostly) and the story all set up such a fantastic epic I find that I cannot identify anything wrong with the game, almost.
Despite all its glory, there is literally one thing about the jewel that is Mass Effect 2 that I just can NOT stand.



Planet Scanning.


Doesn't THAT look fun?!

Even this guy, who is wasting his time posting a video on YouTube on how to find the biggest deposits of Element Zero gets impatient! This guy has not only discovered this location, one way or another, he took the time to record it and post it on the Internet. If the guy who goes to that much trouble to bring the Internet information (at no benefit to himself, mind you) gets irritated and starts skipping around the scan to hurry up and get it done, then it must truly be boring. Well, luckily for logic, it really is that boring.

If you were thinking, whilst watching that grueling process "Man... I hope I don't have to do that more than a few times" I hate to be the one to break it to you.. but you do. A lot more than a few times. You see, planet scanning give you the resources you use for almost everything. Save for the few weapons and some random upgrades you can purchase with credit the big stuff, the stuff that will allow you to complete the final mission with all of your crew living to tell the tale, are purchased with minerals you obtain by planet scanning. So, technically you don't have to scan planets.. but don't expect to do very well in the end.

Anyway, the Mako sucked.. planet scanning sucks. I am really hoping for a planet based mini-game in ME3 that doesn't make we want to kill everyone within a half mile radius. Good luck BioWare! Make me proud (and less bloodthirsty)!

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