Friday, October 29, 2010

Sly Cooper Collection: More Throwbacks!

So in the spirit of re-releases, I wanted to bring a little golden-nugget-of-happy-face knowledge to our PS fan-boys/girls out there. As long as you all promise to be nice. I know how you kids can get! Can we behave? Okay, I trusting you guys. Let's get started.


Okay, I just needed to get that out.
Now, not being a play station junkie myself, I wasn't really sure if this was a good thing or a bad thing. I, personally, am really excited, I played the Sly games back in the day when I actually had a PS, and I thought they were awesome. So, since Chris has a PS3 (which coincidentally is still at my house!) I will almost assuredly be getting this and will be reliving more of my childhood in yet another fashion.

I am such a fan of all this remaking and remastering that has been going on these days. Nintendo has been in a dark and evil place for a while, and now they are coming out and showing us they still know what they are doing. I think it's about damn time that Sony starts following this trend. Sony has a bunch of really great mascots that have really just fallen to the wayside, as the PS3 runs the race with the XBOX360. So here is to super hoping that this is the first of many more oldies to come. I want to see Spyro dammit!

Super Mario All-Stars, US Date Announced!

Time to start dustin' off those sidescroller skills boys and girls. It seems like Nintendo is taking this retro spree to the extreme! And I am loving every freaking minute of it (Like seriously though, it's awesome).

You may(or may not, hell I didn't..) that Super Mario All-Stars was released for the SNES (ahh, see I never owned an SNES) initially, back in 1993, but has now been re-released for the Wii, and it's all re-mastered and pretty and stuff (oooohhhhh!). The catch is, it has only been released in Japan(Dammit!).  Well, Nintendo made no real attempt to let the US fans in on whether or not we were going to get to see this little gem of gaming nostalgia. Not until yesterday (OMGOMG)!! Nintendo finally announced that the US was going to be shipped the Wii's Super Mario All-Stars on December 12 (Just in time for Christmas!! sort of...)! Which will feature Super Mario Bros. Super Mario Bros:2, Super Mario Bros:3, and Super Mario Bros: The Lost Levels. Also, we get to see some cool stuff like booklets and soundtrack (Thats great, I like music and words!). Because it's limited edition, so knowing Nintendo, it will probably also be gold. Gold taken from the all the rainbows and creative-joyful-genius that spews from Miyamoto. 

Thursday, October 28, 2010

StarCraft II: Heart of The Swarm. How long can you wait?

So most of us by now have taken Wings of Liberty and have beaten it over the head at least once. (I personally have not yet completed it, primarily because I really love multi-player, and also the fact I am trying to beat it on the hardest difficulty might have something to do with it.)
The fans are ready for the next episode. Well, get used to the Terran, because Heart of the Swarm will almost assuredly, NOT be released next year, as initially speculated.  IGN interviewed Chris Sigaty, and he essentially said the Heart of the Swarm is going to be huge. "’s bigger than what Warcraft: The Frozen Throne was to Reign of Chaos"

He goes on to say that development is pretty early on, and that considering how big the game is (it also will feature changes in all races that will be applied to multi-player game-play) he does not see releasing the game in 2011 possible.

So, play some multi-player, own some nubs, or play the other plethora of games that will be coming out in the next few months, and play them rrrrrrrreeeeeeeeealllllllllllyyyyyyyyyyyyyy slllllooowwwwwllllyyyyyy...........

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

We do still love you... I Promise...!!

Okay so.... you may have noticed that mondays Features did not go up. well there is an actual valid and completely legitimate reason for that. No, seriously! I would not lie in such a way to all you wonderful people!!

So, what had happened was...

I have about 1.99492QUADRILLION things to do this week, all of them school/test/homework/lab/work related, and so I really have not had time for most things. Like Sleep. Or food. Which might explain why tpynig tihs semes so hrad.................................................

Also, it was Chris' birthday this weekend, so he has been in a happy stupor of new computer and booze. So yea. We shall most definitely resume next week, if not later in the week.
Sorry again, but while you wait on us, you should go check out the new Red Dead Redemption DLC or something.

again, we are really... reeaaalllyyy, RREEEAAAAALLLLYYYY sorry

We are this sorry
Will you ever forgive us?

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Red Dead Redemption: Undead Nightmare DLC Launch Trailer

First off, I want to apologize for being behind in features. Our Site is going through changes, we are adapting our new writers to things, and we're working on what they will be doing. I also turned 21 yesterday and I wasn't about to work on ANYTHING. Stephen has also entered another hell week, which is appropriate because Halloween is coming up. We will get things back on schedule as soon as possible.

Anyway, speaking of Halloween, the Undead Nightmare Launch Trailer was recently put out in accordance with it's release today. I love zombies, but when the DLC was announced over the summer, I was honestly a little bothered by it. Red Dead Redemption was a serious game in a serious universe. Zombies just didn't fit. Then I got off my high horse (HAHA IT'S A COWBOY GAME AND MY ONLINE HANDLE IS OUTLAW) and took it for what it was: A what-if scenario that isn't supposed to be taken seriously. Enjoy the video!

I wish Vincent Price was still alive to play the narrator...

Just to let you all know, I have bought and played a little of it, and it's awesome. It keeps that B-movie horror theme, and the narrator from the video even does a voice-over in the opening cutscene. I love how it's supposed to be cheesy, but the characters react like they should based on their personalities established in the main game. I also love the increased Dead-Eye, which you absolutely need. Also, yes, I've already killed the hell out of a bigfoot. I will post a full review when I finish the game. Happy (zombie) huntin' folks! (I'm allowed to talk like that; I'm from Texas).

Monday, October 25, 2010

In the beginning, there was Blizzard...

I would like to start off by saying thank you to the Outlaw and the Elitist for letting me guest post for a little while. Who knows, maybe this will become a regular occurrence. In the meantime, I'll be the unofficial Blizzard writer. Why? Because it's Blizzard. And they're a big deal. For those of you who don't know, I'm going to give you a brief overview of Blizzard's main game franchises. Then I'll give you some expectations of me in future posts.

Warcraft. Starcraft. Diablo. Three of the most well-known and loved franchises in all of PC gaming. And right now there are a lot of monumental moments going on in those gaming worlds.

Starting with Warcraft: Orcs & Humans, the Warcraft series quickly became one of the best-selling Real-Time Strategy games on the market. A year later, Warcraft II: Tides of Darkness (followed by the expansion Beyond the Dark Portal) followed in its footsteps and expanded on every detail. Many of you may have heard of the next release in the series: Warcraft III: Reign of Chaos and the expansion The Frozen Throne. I was introduced to the series with Warcraft II, but did not play it much myself until Warcraft III. Mind you, I would go back and play the earlier versions for the sake of comparison and progression, but we all know how much it would hurt to play those older games. So alas, I shall not. Essentially, the Warcraft series has been the story of its namesake, the battle between Orcs and Humans. As the story progressed, more races were added to the mix, including the Night Elves and the Undead. But it wasn't until the release of World of Warcraft that the series truly exploded.

World of Warcraft, or WoW as us nerds (intellectual badasses) call it, is one of the leading MMO games on the market. And rightfully so. While it started off a little rough around the edges, Blizzard has made it a much more casual game for the everyday player (to the dismay of many hardcore gamers, I am sure). However, that does not mean there are not plenty of aspects available for hardcore gamers. After spending some time raiding with one of the top guilds on my main server, Sargeras, I know firsthand that there are many hardcore gamers still very much involved with WoW. But I won't get too in-depth into that. For now. But Cataclysm is coming. So you can expect some Warcraft posts before then. And many more after.

The second of Blizzard's series (although these are not in any order of importance) is Starcraft. Definitely one of the premiere RTS games of its time, it has now been overturned by its sequel: Starcraft II: Wings of Liberty. This is the first of a "trilogy" of games, in this case featuring the hardy Terran. Again, I won't go into too much detail about these games right now. But the basic premise is the battle between three races: the Terran, Zerg, and Protoss. Each race is very unique and has various advantages and disadvantages to the other races. I started playing Starcraft II as Protoss, however I have recently changed to the underplayed Zerg. In the future, you can expect tips, builds, etc from me regarding Starcraft II gameplay. And if all goes well, you will soon be able to enjoy the sultry sound of my voice as I begin to commentate some games as well.

And finally, we come to Diablo. While I have yet to play any games in the Diablo series (I have Diablo II installing as I type: less than 2 minutes remaining), I have only heard good things about them. I have been brushing up on the storyline, and I will have to dedicate an entire post (at least one) to the lore of that series. However, the basic premise is the story of the three prime evils in the world of Sanctuary: Mephisto, Lord of Hatred; Baal, Lord of Destruction; and Diablo, Lord of Terror. If that doesn't sound badass, I don't know what does. I will update y'all soon with my thoughts on Diablo II, and I'll be looking forward to the release of Diablo III in the coming months. Hopefully.

So that was Blizzard in a nutshell. I will soon have hands-on experience in each of these three series; and I will give reviews, previews, updates, and random tidbits of each as time goes on, as well as covering news releases from Blizzard. And anything else I deem pertinent. This is going to be fun.

Halo:Reach. New maps announced!!

N-N-N-News post!!

Halo:Reach (as you all know if you read my review!!) is probably my favorite multiplayer/xbox live-ish type game out, and will probably hold that lofty position of honor for some time. In order to ensure that the Halo-fan-boys are happy, Bungie did what online games do. NEW MAPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anchor 9: is a 2-8 player game for Free-For-All, Team Slayer, and Team Objective.

Tempest: 8-16 player match supporting Free-For-All, Team Slayer, and Team Objective, and Big Team Battle.

Breakpoint: 8-16 players can play Invasion and and Big Team Battle.

They look awesome-y and pretty and Halo worthy, and you can see all of it's prettyness and happy joy fun screenshots at Bungie's HUGE announcement. AND YOU CAN FIND THAT HERE!!!!

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Blizzcon 2010!!

So ladies and gents, Blizzcon 2010 has come to an end, and it was quite a bit of fun. News wise, not much was to be found. As I posted earlier, we got a peak at the new Diablo III character, and got to see the world premier of Cataclysm, but as Blizzcon typically is, it consisted mostly of interviews, Q&A's, and panel discussions. Which was pretty cool all in all. The main events are of course the tournaments. There was a WoW Arena tournament, a Warcraft III tournament and, our favorite, a tournament for Starcraft II. We didn't really watch the Warcraft tournaments, because we really got into the SC games, all of us picking people we wanted to win and rooting for the race that we played the most. Unfortunately for me, a Zerg player did not make it to the finals, but two very amazing players did. Loner, the Terran player from China, and NEXGenius, the Protoss player from South Korea. It was a really intense four matches, but the winner, with a 4-0 sweep, was the South Korean player NEXGenius!!

So congratulations to him for a very impressive display, Loner was no easy match. Congratulations also to Loner, for making it as far as he did, he had not lost until he played NEXGenius the second time (they played 3 total matches of best 2/3) So props to him, and to all the players at Blizzcon, for providing us a very entertaining tournament. there was much fun to be had.

In other news, we recorded our first podcast!! It was fun. we enjoyed it and as soon as I figure out how to post it, I will so all you lovelies can hear its ridiculousness. Stay tuned as we pumped out a few more reviews in the following weeks. We've got Fallout3 (which has been really fun so far) and Fable III and Force Unleashed II coming out this week. So, keep your eyes peeled! Game on!!

Saturday, October 23, 2010

A Bit of News

So, as I'm writing this, Chris, Stephen, and I are finishing up watching this year's Blizz-Con, and we are preparing to do our first podcast, where we'll no doubt discuss some of the stuff we've seen there, as well as shoot the breeze about games in general.

As has been mentioned, we've been experiencing some difficulties recently, both in people being sick, busy, preparing for tests, and Chris recently having his computer fail him. Luckily, this issue is going to be resolved, as he is getting a very nice Toshiba laptop to replace it.

Now that I've finished my Silent Hill look-backs, I've decided to settle into a more regular writing cycle, and will be focusing on similar retrospectives on other important games out there. Expect my next article to be up next week, and there's also going to be a bit of a preview of it in the podcast.

Silent Hill 1 and 3: Hell is Empty, All The Devils Are Here.

Oh boy.

Alright, first off, I apologize for the lateness of this article, I intended to have an article over Silent Hill 1 up last week, but during my walkthrough of it, I decided it would be best to cover both Silent Hill 1 and 3 in the same article. Before you ask, yes, this does make sense. It wasn’t very well publicized at the release of Silent Hill 3, and some even consider it to be a bit of a spoiler, although I don’t. The fact is that Silent Hill 3, as opposed to the second game, which was a completely stand-alone game, is actually a direct sequel to the first game, so I considered it to be best to cover both games in one article.

The most pressing issue that I have to ask myself, upon completion of both games, is that, can I honestly recommend Silent Hill 1? The game, when it came out, was very scary, and it certainly has its fair share of scares now, there exists two problems with it that many fans are in quite vehement denial of: first off, the graphics are abysmal. Now, in some cases, I am willing to make exceptions, but games on the Playstation exist on a very unfortunate plane: they lack the ability to say “I don’t have to have realistic graphics; I’m a SNES games!” or “I have good graphics; I’m a PS2 game!” So they exist in a unique quagmire of games where the game’s quality is dependent on other attributes, and unfortunately for the first Silent Hill game, its ability to scare the player is severely diminished by the graphics, and their quality, and the voice acting, which, while the game certainly holds a special place in my heart, is bested by my seventh grade production of The Crucible.

What to say about the game, however, that doesn’t give the impression that I hate it, which I certainly don’t? It is absolutely true that I did enjoy the game when it came out, and there are many people who still enjoy it quite a bit now, but the problem with it is that, in addition to the normal flaws of the series, namely bad voice acting and a worse script, it seems to suffer for it the most. The cutscenes are left feeling cheesy and hokey, as opposed to scary, and the graphics, which have an appearance not unlike lego blocks, unfortunately acts as a severe retardant to the game’s scariness.

Yeah, sorry, maybe I'm spoiled, but this just doesn't have the same impact as the first picture.

The story itself seems simple on the surface, and indeed, on the surface, it is quite simple. I say “on the surface” because there are many things going on underneath the main story, which I’ll get to in a moment. The main story is that a man named Harry Mason, while passing through the town of Silent Hill, crashed his car and lost his girl, Cheryl. Harry is completely focused on getting her back, and plunges himself headfirst into the monsters that begin to occupy the town in order to find her. There are a few side characters, in particular the policewoman Cybil, who helps Harry, the enigmatic Dahlia, who doesn’t really seem to be all there, and a doctor named Michael Kauffman. At first, they seem to be merely backround, but as Harry learns more about the actual goings on, their importance becomes much more apparent.


It turns out that Dahlia and Kauffman are members of a cult in Silent Hill, which secretly runs everything in the town, and that as insane as their cult is, it turns out there is some truth to their mythology. So much so in fact, that the aberrations present within the town are the manifestations of the delusions of a girl named Alessa, who, according to the mythology of the cult, or The Order, is to be the mother of their god, because she was born with unexplainable powers, and thus, 8 years before the events of the game, Alessa was used in a sacrificial ritual where a person is purified before their god by burning them alive. Alessa survives, and receives the spirit of their god within her, and The Order intends to have her birth this “god,” and spread their nightmares across the world.

Alessa, however, wants none of this, and during the ritual, uses her powers to separate her soul from her body, and thus thwart the birth of “god.” This spirit manifests itself in none other than young Cheryl, who, now that she has returned to Silent Hill, the shit has officially hit the fan.

Eventually, Harry himself finds this out, but continues in his journey, because while even he knows that he may never see his girl again, he will never give up looking for her. Due to his non participation in the alleged “background” events of the game, the god is born, but Harry defeats it, since the birthing ceremony is incomplete, and thus the god is weakened. After this, as Alessa dies, she hands Harry a newborn baby, its origins unknown. Harry, recognizing that this child is the closest that he will ever get to his daughter again, leaves the town with the baby, and claims it as his own.


Ultimately, I have to say, that while it was good for its time, Silent Hill 1, which as of this writing, is 12 years old, is simply too dated for me to recommend playing it now, if you didn’t play it when it came out. The people at Team Silent were still getting their legs, and the technology available then simply makes the game not as good as what followed.

However, the story is quite good, and very well presented in spite of the poor script and acting, and plays very well into that of the third game.

The third game itself begins with our protagonist, Heather, asking herself where she is, as she is from the get go, in an area of horrors and danger. The first two games had areas that were simply creepy, but not dangerous to start out in, but Silent Hill 3, tying in with its theme, sets Heather into danger immediately. This theme is one of helplessness, as while you progress, unlike the other games, which would occasionally shift into horrific perversions of the previous areas, but nothing in the series was ever quite as severe as this. The walls are covered in rust, filth, blood, and everything about the Otherworld, as it’s called, has much of the horror of the other games, only cranked up to levels completely unheard of in the series. The Otherworld of the first game was quite scary, but focused mostly on imagery suggestive of incarceration, with occasional overtones of pain, which fit in well with the theme of Alessa’s torture. The second game, in keeping with the more morose story, had a lot of blues and “depressing” colors, but in this game, the Otherworld is like a diseased, fiery hell.

Heather eventually realizes that the area she was in was in fact a dream, and wakes up, with the intent of returning to her home, but comes across a woman calling herself Claudia, who tells Heather that she will be “The one who will lead us to Paradise with bloodstained hands,” and claiming that the horrors that beset Heather are the result of “the hand of God.” Upon hearing this, Heather collapses to the ground in pain, and the world around her descends into a bloody nightmare.

Your primary objective for this portion of the game is to escape the monsters and the terrors of the Otherworld, which, unlike in the first two games, which was confined to the town of Silent Hill, seems to follow Heather around.

Eventually, however, she finds her way home, and this is where the sequel aspect comes into play: it turns out that Harry Mason, the protagonist of the first game, is Heather’s father. It also turns out he has been murdered by The Order, and upon learning this, Heather vows revenge, and intends to return to Silent Hill to kill Claudia.

Now, to those who played the first game, the revelation that Heather is Harry’s daughter raises an interesting question: what exactly is she? She’s the baby that he took with him from the end of the first game, but what does that mean? As I said, to a modern audience, Silent Hill 1 has aged too much, and not in a good way, so does Silent Hill 3 adequately provide enough exposition to find out what is going on?

Ultimately, I say yes. There are a few scenes and moments that are sort of treats to players of the original game, the game is very welcoming to people new to the series, as there are several memos and such peppered throughout that explain what is going on, and what has happened, wheras the first game actually left large portions of the backstory and “behind the scenes” stuff blank, so, in an odd way, Silent Hill 3 actually explains more than Silent Hill 1 does.

The combat of both games is, in typical Silent Hill fashion, extremely non user friendly, and the camera remains one of the more dangerous enemies in the game, but in the first one, the combat remains simple, and ultimately not too much of a challenge. In the third game however, the most commonly suggested strategy for dealing with many of the enemies is the “run away like a scared little girl” strategy. The enemies in this game are quite dangerous, and like Silent Hill 2, are loaded with symbolism, although less overt than in the second game. Primarily, the enemies seem to be rife with symbolism that represents a young girl’s fear of sexual predators, from the looming, lumbering monsters which attempt to batter Heather with its extremely phallic arms (no, that is not me being immature, it’s really what it looks like), the extremely unsettling Slurper enemies, which are vagely humanoid monsters that drag Heather to the ground and appear to molest her. This all makes sense towards the end of the game, when you begin to realize just who and what Heather really is.

Seriously. Fuck these things.

Aside from the usual complaint of the series, which are the poor voice acting (although Heather’s is quite good) and the terrible camera, are the puzzles. Even on normal mode, you will have to consult a guide more than once, and hard riddle mode is simply unfair. There is a puzzle that literally requires you to know the eating habits of the Linnet Bird, which until playing this game, I had never even heard of. There’s also a very unusual puzzle towards the very end that I won’t give away, but you will almost certainly have to consult a guide for it. A bit annoying, but the game still remains one of the scariest experiences ever.

And that ultimately is its contribution. While Silent Hill 2 certainly has the best story, pacing, and all round experience, what it lacks, Silent Hill 3 more than makes up for: sheer unrelenting and abject terror. The game itself is short, and easy to find, and priced very well, and is extremely frightening, especially the last area, which I spent the majority of screaming obscenities as I ran from the horrors that surrounded me. The story isn't quite as good as that of Silent Hill 2, and as for Silent Hill 1, I'd say you're best off reading a synopisis of it, of which there exist several that go into much more detail than I did here, however Silent Hill 3 does a good job of filling the player in. What it does a better job of doing, however, is scaring the poo out of you.

Kirby's Epic Yarn Review

If you look at all my past articles and such, it should be fairly obvious that I partake in many a violent, mature game. However, I have also stated that nothing gets my rocks off more than a (well done) first party Nintendo game. Mario, Zelda, etc, etc; I love pretty much all of them. So when they announced a new Kirby at E3 I kind of developed an excitement filled blood-lust where I went running through the streets killing everything in my path as a sacrifice to the great gods of Nintendo for not forsaking me this quarter. So after playing the game, I would say that all of those deaths were not in vein. I fell in love with it.

Now the first thing that should be quite apparent about the game is that it's extremely adorable. Like... really adorable. Maybe... Overly adorable. Every grown man, including myself, that I've seen come into contact with it immediately reverted to 5 years of age with the vocabulary of a toddler. Basically, the effect a man's puppy has on him. The yarn look is well realized and used extensively (in a good way). However, the stuff that impressed me the most was the other material in the game that had more of an arts and crafts theme. The snow, for example, can be rolled into a ball by enemies and tossed at you. Only it isn't snow; it's cotton and it looks amazing. It's more like Kirby got sucked into an hobby book and I loved every minute of it. Overall, the theme never gets old.

Speaking of most everything being made out of yarn, it is animated as such and it is amazing. Everything from Kirby's feet turning into a little spring when he jumps to unraveling enemies looks gorgeous and I couldn't get enough of it. Kirby's transformations are also fun and add some variety to the gameplay. Everything from Tank Kirby to Space Ship Kirby is fun to play as and left me wanting more. As far as typical gameplay, it's a pretty basic sidescroller. You progress from one side to the other killing (freaking cute) enemies and finding the occasional secret. In fact, the secrets are where the actual challenge lies.

Co-Op Tank Kirby activate!!!

One problem many people seem to have with the game is that you cannot die... at all. This would annoy me, but the penalty for getting hit is almost as bad. Throughout the game, you can pick up beads that you can use as currency, which I'll talk more about in a moment. The thing about them is that you need a certain amount to gold medal a level. It's harder to do this on some levels than others and if you don't care then it takes the challenge out of it, but there is actually one problem with this. When you fall down a pit, a bird-like creature comes to your rescue. Naturally, fitting with the games punishment, you loose beads for this. However, loosing them this way seems unfair. The thing is, when you fall, you continue to drop beads until the bird drops you. This kind of sucks because you can't retrieve them this way, but the bird also takes you back a ridiculous distance. It would have been better if he took you to the platform you fell off of, but he seems to enjoy you getting frustrated a bit too much. Needless to say, watching your hard earned beads fall to nothingness pisses me off. Like I said, if you don't care it's not a big deal... but I do... so it was.

I couldn't find a picture I wanted, so here's some d'awe-inspiring gameplay. Yes, I did just make that up.

The other challenges come from finding hidden treasure which contain the games (amazing) soundtrack and items you can use to decorate a little apartment you get in town. It's a little fun to do at first, but there is really little payoff for it. You can also use beads to buy more items and expand on the apartment complex. The point of this is to add more empty rooms, that when you decorate a certain way, attracts new tenants. This tenants give you access to mini-games (hide-and seek, racing, bead-collecting, ect), which are only really there to provide a challenge and give you more beads and wallpapers, which is actually kind of roundabout. I tried to do all of them for the sake of 100% completion, but then I realized I was getting bored with them and that there was little point. They are still fun for a while, but I preferred to focus more on the challenge of gold medaling levels and finding all the treasure.

This is actually kind of misleading... Kirby never looks this angry in the game.

The other optional challenge lies in the boss fights, which are actually some of the coolest ones I've seen all year. The magician boss fight in particular was extremely different and impressive. If you collect enough beads in a boss fight, you unlock a new patch which can be used to open new bonus levels. All well and good. The two player mode is also fun and even changes up some of the transformations. For example, when you play as the tank with two players, the tanks gets an arm add-on that only the second player controls. All very cool and fun.

I don't know why yarn/fire doesn't just burn up, but it's best not to ask questions.

There is really little more to say beyond all this. It is a well realized experience that's as hard as you want it to be. Some might find fault with this, but the fact of the matter is that Kirby games have never been especcially difficult. They are about being cute and having fun and Epic Yarn accomplishes both of these goals in equal measure. If your Wii has been collecting dust, do yourself a favor and dust it off for this one.

9 out of 10 balls o' yarn. Derp.

Blizzcon: Diablo III: Newest class!


Okay. sooooooooo Blizzcon, lots of warcraft and starcraft matches, which is cool, but one cannot really write too much about that. However, what I CAN write about. is... DIABLO III!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11oneone!!eleven!!
Well really all I have to bring you for this premier Blizzcon article is the newest addition to the Diablo III class list. The Demon Hunter. Sounds badass right? well, you would be right.

So there ya have it. Diablo III looks bad ASS and man am I excited!

In other news, Cataclysm. Tonight experienced the world primer of Cataclysm type gameplay. It was pretty awesome, pretty sexy (the whole, flying in Azeroth thing.) I don't want to geek out for days about how fantastically AWESOME the live raid was, so instead, you should go look it up if you can find it. Pretty hilarious and, of course, awesome, that way you can nerd-gasm on your own time. BLIZZCON!!! Stay tuned folks!

Friday, October 22, 2010

Halloween Special: Silent Hill 3

Sorry for the late post everyone! I have apparently pissed off the very specific deity of computer monitors so misfortune ensued. Don't get excited, though. It is still quite broken. I have merely used a combination of ingenuity and favors Satan owes me. Basically, I turned it on to see how it was doing, and moved it around to the point where it decided to work. I assure you, the second it moves an inch it will become enraged and possibly kill small to average sized children. So while I have it working I will post as much as possible before I hand it over to Stephen to fix this thing (without pay of course).

Anyway, I don't mean to step on Austin's Silent Hill features, but I would feel a fool if I didn't talk about this moment in an article over scary things. And seeing as my online handle is actually in the title of the blog, he can deal with it *puts on sunglasses while the scream from Don't Get Fooled Again plays". Anyway, I have a confession to make about this one. I haven't actually played the game. BUT, I did watch Austin play through it in its entirety and this moment didn't require me to be playing the game to be scary so there!Cuddles wuuuuvs youuuuu!

ANYWHOOOOO, this moment actually came as a shock to my roommate/friend/co-writer
Austin and me, as it took place at a rather peculiar time. The protagonist, Heather, has to enter an amusement park, where she actually died at in a dream at the beginning, and make her way through it. Of course, this being an amusement park in a horror game, she has to go through a haunted house. We were a little unsettled by this, but as we listened to the recording that plays over the segment we came to the conclusion that something rather clever was going on. The thing is the whole situation seemed rather hokey. In a game full of unspeakable horrors and scares it became apparent that the haunted house was purposefully made cheesy. I actually found it amusing. And then this happened... sometime after the 1 minute mark.


Anyway, now that I've changed pants, I must continue my writing spree. I have reviews to work on and only a little time before my computer goes all wonky again. Remember readers, you can help me appease the monitor god simply by sending me money. Lots and lots of money.

A Bad Case of Tech-no Rebellion.

By "tech-no" I of course mean technology... I don't listen to that techno refuse they call "music" Any who...
You may have noticed (but more likely you haven't) that Chris has been lame at posting things when they are due, for instance his Halloween special just didn't go up Wednesday. That is primarily because his computer is broken and he is too damn stubborn to use my computer, because it's a Mac. Even though.. all he had to do was TYPE!! Silly red-headed-child...

So anyway, he is forcing me into slave labor in order to fix his monitor. So as I slave over his broken laptop in the sweat shop he crafted for me, we will be using my computer in order to bring all of you lovely people all that we can on Blizzcon. Tomorrow will be much more substantial, and hopefully will be full of working screens, happy pc's and loads of news! So, as we get stuff from Blizzcon, we will be posting it, so keep your eye on us this week to get all the latest on Blizzcon!! Thanks ladies and gents! 

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Assassins Creed: Brotherhood. New trailer brings catchy badass-ery.

 Today I bring you a long past due news update!! We have been so wrapped in bringing yall some reviews of the big games everyone is asking about, we almost forgot about news! Well today I have very very good news. In the form of some trailer awesomeness.

It's full of all one would expect from a new Assassins Creed trailer. Sweet freaking assassin type killing, Ezio being really action-y and cool, and cryptic monologue from the antagonist revealing a tantalizing plot teaser.
Also, look, the animus acts up some, don't forget about Desmond!!
Should be a great game, looks promising to be sure.

Look at How Sexy This Is!!!!

Woa!!! The blog looks fancy and cool now!! Also, I have a confession. I have begun to dabble in the Dark Arts: HTML. I am however, really bad at it. If any of you lovely people know a place on that internet thing that teaches basic HTML pretty well, I would like to know of it. Also also, the site will be under construction on and off as we fine tune the new features, but post our updates and bring you more news we still shall. Also, also, also, let us know what you think about the new look and if you have any suggestions! Thanks kiddos!

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

The Outlaw's Least Favorite Game Moments: Max Payne 2 Escort Mission

Boy oh boy do I love me some Max Payne. My love for the series is why I was so excited about Alan Wake (also made by Remedy). However, there is one kind of mission in video games that I absolutely can't stand, and that is the escort mission. And yes, Remedy decided to put one into the second entry of the Max Payne series.

Luckily for me, and all gamers who don't practice sad0-masochism, the escort mission seems to be a thing of the past, at least in it's conventional form. It usually involves playing guardian angel to some brain-dead ass hat who thinks it's better to make a run for it than hide behind cover, and that is exactly what this mission is. The other problem with this particular scenario is the man you are protecting, Vinnie Gognitti. For those of you who are not familiar with the series, Vinnie is probably the most annoying character in it. He's a stereotypical cowardly New York mobster who you basically left for dead in the first game; only now you have to defend him. I won't go into details on why, just know that it's really annoying. OBSERVE!!!

This mission sure is a Payne in the ass!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! *Throws self out of window*

Granted, the person in the video is doing a pretty good job. It does seem like he has the enemy attack plan well memorized, though. In any case, this mission is only made worse from all the yelling Vinnie does. "Ya gotta save me, Payne!" Ugh... The thing is an escort mission will only mean something to the player if he cares about the person he is protecting; and Vinnie, well let's just say I had wanted him dead since the first game. Luckily, Remedy didn't pull anything like that in Alan Wake. Now they just need to kick the awkward, unnecessary platforming segments they seem to love so much. See ya soon!

The Elitist's Favorite Game Moments: Resident Evil 5

First and Fore-most, SEMI-SPOLERZ!!!

Zombies Zombies Zombies Zombies Zombies!!! Sort of.. special unique Resident Evil Zombies... don't get mad Internet.

This however, has nothing to do with them.
This has everything to do with the pure manly-awesomeness that is Chris Redfield (and the mutant-manly-awesomeness that is Albert Wesker)

Chris Redfield, he has had enough of your bullshit.
Even Sheva has manly-awesomeness, although if that is manly... whew...! So much greatness is flying around in that airplane. Chris isn't ever scared, well because he is Chris Freaking Redfield, and fear is unknown to him. Besides, if you had biceps bigger than the Thighs of Thor, you would never be scared either. Wesker is simply a bad-ass, not way you can deny it, and Sheva is pretty cool. Cool enough to stab Wesker. Unfortunately for her, he takes in the arm like a man and starts chokin-a-b**** (She does facilitate Redfields successful injection I suppose). All the teleporting around while giving his noble speech, the fantastically choreographed and implemented scuffles and combat moments, it's just pure adrenaline inducing greatness. Now, I apologize for this brief moment, enjoy the epic that I have delivered. I have some Fallout New Vegas to play. Remember, brevity is the sp-

Monday, October 18, 2010

Halloween Special: F.E.A.R.

I had to change this picture 3 times....
If you have played any or all of the FEAR games, should have expected this game to show up eventually in our Halloween special. This game is freakin called FEAR, and ignoring it's attempt at making FEAR an acronym, its sole intent was to be as horrifying and disturbing. It is pretty successful, FEAR is probably one of the more terrifying games I have ever played. I am not too overly found of horror games, primarily because it's really hard to find good ones, but this game is a gem. Granted, it's a relatively simple FPS, as far as gameplay goes, and the fear factor is primarily a jump/ohshits!! factor, but it is still a game worthy of the Halloween Special.

There are plenty of moments in the game that are pretty frightening, for instance that stupid broad Alma likes to show up in the most wonderful of situations to make you squeal like a little girl, however the idea of these articles is to bring light to not just a jumpy scary moment, but a time where a game puts you into a psychologically threatening environment, filled with all the severely sinister things to make you cry for mommy.
So, without further adieu, a bloody hallway!! :D

Oh hey... this is uncomfortable.. blood.. in the ceiling.. dripping down the walls. I'll just run, no.. no I can't move quickly. Okay cool, the door-just shattered in my face Hmm well OHMOTHEROFTHESWEETBABYJESUSAGHO- oh phew...

That creepy creepy terrifyingly psychotic hussy...
Pretty threatening stuff. The music/sound effects, that you can't really hear in that video unfortunately, along with the general messed-up that is blood suspended above your head, all coupled with the jump effect that stinking ghost had, make this moment an upper echelon of creepy game moments.

Sunday, October 17, 2010



You see? Awesomeness, in fantastical artistic form. This brilliant piece of work is now the official logo for the O and E. How did two humble writers for a budding blog afford such obviously professional art? Well, we are lucky enough to know the very talented Christine Suggs. She was kind enough to take a request from us to draw this wonderful piece of art. So when you admire this unbeatable logo for our blog, be sure to emit your awe and gratitude for adding such masterpiece to art to the amazingly awesome Christine Suggs! Because she is awesome!! :D Thanks Christine!!  

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Halloween Special: Mr. Tibbits from Condemned

Oh Condemned, you sure were scary... in pretty much every way. Games like F.E.A.R. had scary moments with not scary, action based combat. Bioshock could even bring the scares. Condemned, however, never let up. Walking around, looking for clues, fighting; it could all be scary. And then there's Mr. Tibbits... That goddamn Mr. Tibbits.

You see, in Condemned you are a detective trying to solve a string of murders. It's an older game, but I won't give anything away. At one point, you find yourself trying to find an old gym teacher (Mr. Tibbits), at least that's what I remember going on, in a school at night. When you find him, he isn't in all that great of shape... Literally. Like... his face is all cut up and not symmetrical at all or anything. Anyway, as a good investigator, you have to examine the body for evidence. Well first thing's first: Time to take a picture of the face and send it in for identity confirmation...


Scary man is scary. Somehow this moment stands out above all the others in a game full of scary moments. I'll probably use this game a lot more for these Halloween articles, though. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll go deal with the trauma this scene has brought up again. All those months of therapy down the toilet.

Friday, October 15, 2010

Medal of Honor Review: Ugh...

      So it really hurts me to have to say this, but damn was this over-hyped. We have all seen the trailers and videos, we have felt the hype and if you are like me you fell victim to the excitement. So upon Medal of Honor's release I wad really excited to see what new turn the game had taken to make it seem like such an awesome addition to the FPS genre. Well, I must bare bad news, and inform you that... nothing as changed.
     Alright, where to begin. My first impression was hopeful. The beginning was pretty intense and it's starts you off pretty fast. Well that's pretty much where the cool ends. As soon as I gain control of my character I immediately start trying to change the control scheme, because the default just felt... clumsy. Even after setting my buttons to something I was comfortable with, it never felt fluid. I never really had that, "one-with-the-controller" feel. I never felt completely in-tune with the game. No special feature or new design, very typical FPS controls. Expected, not much of an issue, save for the awkwardness.
     My next issue is that the graphics are deceptive. During the cinematic moments, it looks pretty, but its a cinematic. once the game fires up it looks like Medal of Honor has always looked, one step below what we want. The blood animation is mediocre at best, the explosions are fast and are lacking detail, the environment is uninteresting. Just looks like another boring FPS.
     Finally, the biggest issue is the over-all game play. The missions and objective are so ridiculously mundane. I didn't want to compare this game to Modern Warfare, because I initially thought that wasn't fair, but the more I thought about it, CoD has set the new bar for realistically styled war games, and if Medal of Honor wanted to be a stressful game, it needed to be new and innovative, comparable to CoD. Infinity Ward changed the way people think about the FPS genre. The missions felt so much more involved the characters were people you could relate to and were character you wanted to protect, it made the mundane mission scheme feel more interesting and exciting. Those are the types of things that new FPS need to accomplish in order to be successful. Medal of Honor, sadly, did not meet this condition. It was boring, repetitive, just another unexciting FPS.

     To be fair, the multiplayer is pretty fun, the maps are fairly involved, and the it is really hard to mess up general FPS matchmaking game play. Towards the end of the game, things get more interesting, but not enough to validate the entire game. There are some pretty neat control features, for instance you can sprint and then slide, in order to reach cover faster. Once behind cover, you can lean out to get better shots and what-not, pretty neat. So what does all this mean to you? Don't buy it. If you don't believe me, and you must play it, rent it. Then after experiencing it for yourself, decide if you want it. The matchmaking may be worth $70 to you, maybe you absolutely love old-style FPS, and this is right up your ally, great. Please rent it first if you must play it.

Score: 6 out of 10 uninteresting games.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Sonic 4 Review

If you dwell into the internet at all you have probably noticed a few things. One is that Sonic 4 is getting great reviews. The other is that a lot of "fanboys" talk a lot about hating it even though they haven't played it. Do me a favor: if you meet any of these haters on the street, take out an actual hedgehog, roll it into a ball, and throw it into their face. Sonic 4 is in fact a worthy successor to the original Genesis games.

It is no secret that the Sonic fan base is hard to please. You have people such as me who grew up on the Genesis ones, you have fans of the shows (I actually have an affinity for the old goofy one with just Sonic and Tails), people who likes the comics, and people who love the newer 3D ones. I'm going to be honest; I hate most of the stuff from today and I hate Sonic Adventure 1 after playing it again. Thus, I have been waiting forever for an actual 2d sequel and that's why I flipped out when it was announced.

The first thing I can tell you is that the additions are fantastic. I have seen a lot of people complain about them throwing in the homing attack from Adventure and I am telling all these people to shut the hell up. There is nothing wrong with adding this move. Does anyone remember that Sonic 1 didn't have the spin-dash? Exactly, and now it's a staple of the Sonic series. So back the hell off!!!! (I rant a lot). In fact, it can be used to counter one of the few problems I have with the game: It takes a bit too long to speed up. However, this can be remedied by jumping and air dashing (the homing attack) and Sonic will get up to speed in no time. If you don't like it you don't even have to use it, but it will help you get to new areas, as any good Sonic move should.

Another great change is what Sonic does when he hits a speed panel. Instead of just running, he goes into the ball. This way he takes out any enemies he hits instead of running into them loosing rings in the process. Let's be honest, the originals DID have problems and the occasional cheap enemy was one of them.I know that bastard that pops out of the wall is around here somewhere...

Everything else is a giant love letter to the series. Sometimes, there are some weird sections where you move the environment instead of Sonic, but it's just new; not bad. That is the only main structural difference. The levels are big and ripe for exploration. Any true Sonic fan knows that the old games were just as much about that as running. Then there's the nostalgia. I couldn't even begin to talk about the sound. The music is just "right" and most of the sound effects are straight out of the originals. I wish they had kept the original invincibility music, but it is in no way an issue. There are also lots of throwback enemies and boss fights. Some people say the reused boss fights are lazy, but I call them classic. The thing is, they are changed and tweaked to make them feel new and challenging. It also takes you by surprise when Robotnik (I refuse to call him Eggman) breaks out a new move.

Well this seems famil.... WHAT THE SHIT!!!

EVEN THE BONUS STAGES ARE THROWBACKS!!! Except you control the stage instead of Sonic. It's actually really cool.

Also, and all of you old school Sonic fans will love this, it is just Sonic. None of his annoying friends have come along to ruin the game. Don't get me wrong, I originally liked tails and knuckles, but they've gotten annoying. And don't get me started on Shadow... that emo twit is one huge symbol of one of the big problems with the 3d games.
A good lot of these should die in a fire.

My only other problems, besides the speed up time, are that it could have been prettier and longer. That isn't to say it isn't good-looking (Sonic's running animation is gorgeous), it could just look better. I also don't like that it's episodic. I want my full game now, dammit! Other than that, it is the purest Sonic game in years and I am absolutely in love with it. It's length is honestly the only thing keeping it from getting a perfect score.

The game just feels right and I can honestly say I love almost everything about it. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. You won't find a better Sonic game anywhere else this side of the originals.
9 out of 10 rings!

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Review for Castlevania: Lords of Shadow: Oblivium Sempiternum Daemonis

            The Castlevania bandwagon always appeared to me like just a Metroid knock-off. Well, it kind of was, but it was good. It was an answer to a wildly successful game to a public that wanted more and it took off, creating its own fan base. I was late to party and I could not regret it more. I have played (although not beaten) all of the Castlevania games for NES, SNES and the few that released for the DS. I even tried the attempts made to bring Castlevania to the consoles in the PS2/GCN/XBOX era. Those always left me wanting for more, they were not very well-produced games, and so I was left with a conditioning that Castlevania will always be doomed to old-school side-scrolling adventure. Upon seeing that Lords of Shadows was going to a reboot on Castlevania, I shied away immediately, knowing what I had experienced previously, my poor gamer heart can only take so much emotional abuse. We are a fragile people, us gamers.  After reading a lot and seeing what was released on the game, I decided it was worth a chance. After all, it looked so damn pretty.Initially, I was torn. There were things about it that I absolutely loved, but there were things that made me throw my controller to the ground, sending my battery pack sailing across the floor (took me 15minutes to find the damn thing). So I think the best way to bring to you the low down on Castlevania: Lords of Shadow is to be completely unoriginal and throw you the pros and cons!
        Good things: There are a’plenty. The immediately obvious thing about the game is that it is gorgeous, and the beauty is not limited to the cinematics, for the game-play looks just as good. There is a moment when Gabriel breaks through a stained-glass window, and the glass shatters all around him, the light is reflecting off all the shards of colored glass, and he is sailing through with the sun at his back, it really is quite inspiring. The environment was fluid and detailed. Very detailed. Too detailed sometimes, but I’ll mention that later. Not only the environment is a great testament to the visual beauty of the game. The characters act, flow and are animated with such perfection, I thought at times that actors had to have physically done this (and they probably did) because it was far to flawless. The voices matched perfectly with the animations of the characters, to create such a seamless experience. Voice acting is so so very crucial to gaming in this generation (for me anyway), and Konami knew that, and recruited a fantastic team to voice the characters in LoS. No complaints from me there. It is truly a marvelous thing, to see acting (animation), and voicing match in such a stunning manner.
Special thanks to IGN, for having awesome pictures.
Moving toward actual game-play mechanics, the obvious first step seems like combat. 99% of the time, I really enjoyed the combat. Gabriel wields his Combat Cross (such a lame name….) with such finesse and agility; it really is very fun to watch. The combos are easy, and are structured in such a way that feels very intuitive to string together 2-3 combos at a time. Gabriel can adapt two magical stances, which only increase the awe of his combat, and the pure amounts of kick-ass you can allow him to dish out. It really is a fun and fluid system, most of the time. Again I shall reach all of these negative Nancy comments in due time. My final praise for the game is the plot. As soon as you start the game, it immediately starts to put you behind the eyes of Gabriel. You are told his story, and are made to sympathise with him, he has been put through such an agonizing experience, he is a man who has nothing left to lose, but with everything to gain; he has but one motivation. His determination, while strong, is always conditional, for death would always bring him what he truly desires: To see his love once again.  The torment Gabriel endures is worn so well on character, without removing his stalwart demeanor as a warrior.  The narrations (voiced by Sir Patrick Stewart, making them the most comforting and soothing things you will every hear) through out the game describe Gabriel, and his decent into darkness so poetically; it so wonderfully evokes a powerful feeling of pathos in the player.
Bad Things: the part I don’t really want to do. For all my googly-eyed talk of how pretty is, how it manages to keep Castlevania charm and how much fun the combat is, all of those things have pretty noticeable flaws, flaws that made scoring this game quite difficult. I mentioned that the amount of detail was an issue, how can more beauty be a problem? Well figure it out! No wait don’t go! Okay, I’ll tell you… You see, during the game, you encounter many obstacles that need to be overcome by climbing on walls of cathedrals, castles, canyons walls and the like.  To do this, you mainly jump from ledge to ledge with the occasional need to swing to other parts using your Combat Cross. This is where an over active attention to detail became a problem. At times, the next ledge would not be overly apparent, the environment was so beautiful and realistic, that it was not always obvious where Gabriel could jump next, often times leading to the player attempting to make a jump to what they thought was a ledge and when it turned out NOT to be a ledge, well, you plummet to your death.  This was not a huge deal, but I mentioned it, so there 
Look Cool Mounts!! not...
My main issues with the game are the following three problems. Frame rate issues, inconsistent enemies (this happened far to frequently), and stupid STUPID mount mechanics. Normally I would have said a stuttering frame rate would kill a game. I cannot stand when a game is not fluid. Perhaps a majority of the pulls at the consistency of the frame rate was done on purpose, but it was hidden quite well. Upon completing a finishing move, the screen distorts slightly and “time” slows for a moment as you land the final hit. This hid the issue quite well. I speculate that is why they implemented such a feature, which, in my opinion is lazy. However, it was very effective, and I only noticed the issue when I was really paying attention to it. The average gamer will most likely look over it without a second thought. Still, it’s lazy. SEGWAY: The mini-bosses in the game were usually very obvious in declaring their greater importance to the every day baddie. They have health bars, they are mean. They varied in difficulty, but none were just “OMFG RAWR NERDRAGE!!!” hard.  The frustrating thing was that there were several versions of the little mass mobs you fight throughout the game that were bigger meaner and stronger than their less threatening counter-parts. You would be fighting little Lycanthropes, and huge friggen werewolf would occasionally show up and want to rofl-f**k your face. My issue with these variant monsters was that they were hard as shit! They were more often than not way harder than any of the mini-bosses and were often who you fought before fighting the mini-bosses. Fighting one at a time was not an issue, but the game would throw 3-4 at some point up to 6 at you at one time.
Again, I am not one to piss and moan about game difficulty, but I was playing on the 2nd difficulty (one up from the easiest) and there were times where my controller became airborne. The other issue with these bastards was that they showed up all the bloody time. Every step you took, you were fighting another Vampire version 2.0 or four. It became annoyingly frequent, because every time was a chore, and instead of an enjoyable challenge, it was just effing vexatious.
Doesn't look much like Twilight does it? That is a real Vampire my children.
My last issue is so very minor, but my lord it was stupid. You would encounter obstacles that Gabriel could not surpass, so obviously you had to find something that could surpass this video-game vicissitude. The form, in which you did this, was a mount. Sounds pretty awesome doesn’t it? Riding Cave Trolls, forcing them to smash the bejeebers out of everything that moves. Well I guess it was, as long as you only wanted to stay in the first room, ya know the room in which you acquired this mount, because after you utilized your mounts ability once it becomes immediately useless, and you must kill it move on. Every. Bloody. Time. Oh also, the mounts are the same overly difficult reoccurring monsters I mentioned before, so you have to best them yet again, if you want to use them as mounts. AAAANNNNDDDDDD! If for whatever reason you accidentally kill the damn thing before mounting it, you get to beat it again. Ugghh... it was just really stupid and I hated it every time.  Luckily it didn’t occur too many times.

Look Magic! Look... Despair....
So that’s my yay and nay for Castlevania: Lords of Shadow. What does this mean for your wallet? Well, if it takes you a while to beat games, I recommend it.  Buy it, and just gnaw away at it. It is a surprisingly long game, over all it is very fun, and its problems are easy (enough) to over look for a casual gamer. You could play the game for 40hours and never find all the secrets, so if you are a completionist, get it; you will be chewing on it for a good long time. If you have a lame weekend at home by yourself and all of your friends are out of town (my situation) rent it. I buckled down and knocked it out in a weekend. Granted, I didn’t even come close to 100% and I didn’t play on the hardest difficulty, but it occupied my weekend very efficiently. So, there ya have it, children. Give Konami’s newest Castlevania: Lords of Shadow a check out, it’s worth it.
Score? 8 out of 10

Halloween Special: BioShock

     First person shooters were becoming more and more repetitive, they were redundant, they were not very innovative, and they were loosing allot of what made them so exciting. The industry was being saturated with your typical shooter. Same mechanics were used over and over, same uninteresting plot, same cookie cutter shooter. Irrational Games said they have had enough with boring shooters, I mean, how many times have we relived WWII? Its time to change the game. Introduce BioShock. BioShock is easily one of my favorite games for the new-gen, and I could nerd-gasm and fanboy freak out all day on its ingenious integration of classic first-person-shooter mechanics and cutting-edge mechanics, all rolled into a brilliantly engrossing story line, and a freaking genius setting that left the gamer feeling satisfied and dying for more (tee-hee) but I won't. Instead, I'll boil my geek love down to one singular moment, one that, coincidentally, coincides with scary stuff (cause that's the Halloween thang)
Big drills are scary...
     BioShock had a pretty creepy, even psychotic, theme. People had gone completely insane due to their lust for ADAM. So with crazy junkies looking for their next fix, they do what all addicts do, rig baby strollers up to explode, they kill each other trying to find their beloved ADAM, which of course, they steal from little girls, after killing them. Oh also, the little girls are guarded by huge behemoths with giant guns/drills for hands. Typical day in Rapture. So with all this crazy flying around, there is bound to be some terrifying, life threatening moment, right? You bet'cha.
Pretty early on in the game, you walk into a very very poorly lit room. The only light is emanating from a spotlight in the middle of the room. The spotlight is centered on a very important crazy-killer. The Shotgun.
Awesome I got a shotgun! And look, there is even ammo! Wait... what was that noise...? Man, it sure is dark in here....

*pant* *pant*

     Awesome. First time I did this, I am almost positive that I was yelling many expletives, as psychotically murderous Splicers were jumping from the pitch black that surrounded me with guns, knives, and crazy hooked scythe blade type things on their hands. Quite an adrenaline rush, with a very high scare-the-pants-off-of-me factor (if I could be scared, but I mean, I ain't never scared).

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

The Outlaw's Favorite Game Moments: Medal of Honor Frontline

So this time I decided to look to new releases for inspiration for today's feature, and then it hit me: The Medal of Honor reboot comes out on Tuesday. The series hasn't been very relevant since Call of Duty came out, but back in it's prime it was a very important shooter. If you've been following the media at all, or reading some of my more newsy articles, you would know that the new Medal of Honor has been causing a lot of controversy, but for now let us forget all that. We're going to the PS2 era.

Remember, this was some years ago and us gamers weren't all burnt out on World War II games. Saving Private Ryan was also one of the big new movies around this time. Thus, the inspiration for one of the greatest opening moments in games was born; The D-Day invasion in Medal of Honor: Frontline.


See, I didn't know this was going to be happening at the beginning. I was, however, a little history nerd. That's why when the date popped up all I could think was, "nuh-uh... I have to survive D-Day..." Oh boy was I right. Looking back, no it wasn't all that hard, and the game only put about a dozen people on the beach at once, but it didn't matter. When I emerged from the water and saw German machine guns shooting everything around me, I felt trapped with nowhere to go; just like I was supposed to. When I hid in a bombed out hole I didn't want to leave. Why? BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE FREAKING DYING OUT THERE!

No it wouldn't be much today, but back then this was the epitome of realism. I must have played this part of the game 15 times when I was in middle school. Here's hoping the reboot I'll be picking up tomorrow can live up to this kind of legacy. (It also has to rip me away from Sonic 4 episode 1 ;-) ) Also, the little poem at the beginning always makes me tear up a little.

Also, the part where you go undercover in a bar is pretty awesome too. It probably won't get a full feature though, because I can't find a good video and well... I kinda just mentioned it here. Enjoy!

Monday, October 11, 2010

The Elitist's Least Favorite Game Moments: The Legend of Zelda.

     As you may have gathered, and as all who know me are well aware, I love Legend of Zelda. I have played them all, and save for Zelda II, there is not one I don't like. Granted, there are others I like more, but I enjoy them all (again, save for that piece of refuse, Zelda II..grrrr). Yet, somehow, a Zelda game has popped up in my least favorite moments. Well, my explanation to that, is these are the games that I have put the most time into and therefore I know them better than any other game I have played. This moment, is once again, about an ending, but not so much how the game ends because (um... spoilers alert..?)
lets be serious, you kill Ganon, save Zelda.. the end...
but actually last thing you do in the game. Defeat Ganon.


     Now, this is not going to be a whine-fest of me complaining how bastard hard Ganon was, because honestly, after recently beating the game again, he really isn't that hard. My issue with that final fight as to be taken in context. And for that, we must go back to simpler days of Power Rangers, Super Nintendos (well.. NES in this case...) and bruised knees, to my childhood!!

     So, lets imagine, I am probably about 8, maybe 9 years old now, I have sufficiently trounced Bowser and saved Princess Peach over and over, when my mother (who was a huge gamer, and quite the nerd, taught me everything I know! *tear*) suggested I play Zelda, she had the special edition, with a map, that she had filled in almost 100%, and that I would really enjoy it. I fell in love with it, and started my, to this day, adoration for the franchise. I played for weeks and weeks (cause games are a whole lot harder when you are 8, they don't give you glowing trails or arrows to your destination, and you don't really have an Internet to help you.) and I finally make it to the final labyrinth, I make my way through a (still) ridiculously difficult final dungeon, to arrive at the ultimate challenge, Ganon.
Imagine my disenchantment, when I have to face this (remember, I'm 8)

     So, I walk in, I see Ganon, then poof. He is gone. I haven't been playing video games for 12 years yet, I don't realize that those fireballs emanating from nowhere are probably Ganon, I flee from fireball after fireball hoping to sweet Jesus that he delivers me from this hellish rat race. Okay, well primarily I just die, over and over again. I become frustrated and I quit. 2 days later I make a new file, and go through it all again! With no Internet to help, no friends who were gamers, and a mother who had never beaten him either, I was simply lost. The boss frustrated me over and over again until just recently (2-3 years ago I guess) I decided to play through it again, and was able to beat him without much trouble.

     Now, you have to understand, I don't dislike this moment, for what it is, explicitly, but for what it was to me when I experienced it for the first time. It was frustrating, angering, and as far as I could tell, impossible. It nearly ruined the game for me. Luckily I was a child and cared not for such things. For me this was a moment that seemed to be the only flaw in an other wise perfect game.

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